Good news! Today, I am in high spirits. I am truly in a good mood on this Wednesday, and you know what? It is so refreshing. Yes, I tend to be a fairly happy guy day-in day-out, but to be honest, I’ve kinda been struggling to maintain my happiness in recent days. But today, I am happy.
I’ve been soaking in the stale pool of my thoughts for far too long these past couple of weeks. It is not good to think and think…especially not for me. I have had some good conversations with those close to me the past week or so, and I am starting to regain a healthy perspective on where I am currently at. For a little while there I was quite discontent. I was hoping to gain more from certain aspects of my life. Things such as seminary, my lack of a strong community of friends, and my fragmented schedule have been bringing me down. Through some (but certainly not all) of my internalizing, but mostly through conversations, I have come to realize I was putting too much hope on these things that simply cannot give me what I desire. I also realize that I may have been a bit selfish in some of my desires. While I am sad in many ways that certain parts of my post-grad life are not quite as I imagined, I am hopeful that things will get better. In fact, today they are. There is no guarantee that tomorrow will be the same as today, but for now, I am happy.
A quick aside: despite the anxiety in my life lately, there have been some truly great parts. My girl and I are doing great and having lots of fun as we enjoy this stage of our relationship. The convos with my friends have been wonderful, and in effect, have brought me a little closer to them. Those things are good and certainly have given me lots of goodness throughout some otherwise semi-difficult times.
I am definitely in a period of time in which I am starting to process my life and where it is going. I really am not sure of the details of my future, but instead of dreading that, I choose to see it as an opportunity to explore any possibilities. Who knows what God has in store for me. But you know what? Today, I trust Him. Sometimes it’s not so easy, but on this day of happiness, it’s not so hard. Here’s hoping I can maintain that trust through all the good and bad.
I hope you had a good day today. But if you didn’t, hang in there the best you can, for a good day is coming your way soon, and it will be sweeter than the February sun.